Friday, June 29, 2012

Things People Usually Don't Know

Well, I'm stealing this from Socorro. Mostly because her brain works a lot like mine, usually when my brain works like someone else's and the person acknowledges and knows it as well---well lets just say we usually end up being friends for a remarkably long time. I can name at LEAST 5 people that I have said to share a brain with. Two of which I've known 8yrs+....really.

This might even be helpful if you have just met me and you're just really curious about me, and/or like if we've already been friends and we haven't talked a lot or you just don't really pay much attention lol!

Socorro did 10 things, but lemme see if I have that many, or even moar...hmmm..

A lot of people really don't know this about me, because when you first meet me and maybe even like weeks and months after you meet me, I am really really quiet. However, I'm observant, it sounds odd- but I study personalities, I sense them and adapt to them. There are VERY few people in this world that know my true personality, and there are reasons for that. Its not the common untrustworthy thing, even though at times and depending on the persona of the individual it can be true, usually its just because when people get to know me, they either think I'm reallly weird, crazy, psycho, nuts, or just insane. My brain works really weird, I only have a handful of friends that can keep up with what I'm saying or doing. I think of weird things, and my mind works on over time like all day long. Occasionally I get to like get out some of the weirdness and just have random hyper/crazy moments and thats usually when (if around virgin-to-annie-hyperness) people start looking at me weird. My best friends, know this look, as they are more outgoing and are given this daily, or they just don't get out much, or do do they just not have a fuck to give. Either way... let it be known, I'm really random, and there will be somethings that I will say that you'll just overall raise an eyebrow at be like...."the fuhhhh---did that come from??"

2. I'm not a particularly loud-spoken person.
My voice is really quiet, and I mumble a lot of my words. Not on purpose, I really don't like being the center of attention in a group of people I do not know. I don't mind in a group of people I'm more familiar with, but its still not my favorite. I enjoy attention, just not all the time. I like being invisible, like I was in High School. Going un-noticed is kinda fun sometimes.
Sometimes people get easily annoyed with me though, because I'll tell them something, sometimes important and I won't speak loud enough or clearly enough and they'll get angry and make me repeat it. I'M REALLY SORRY.

I know it's Utah, however--I don't really cling to one religion or another. Let's try and put it this way, I have a "potty-mouth". I say fuck, shit, ass, hell a lot, I don't really believe in "bad words", there's words that you can describe someone that you know and mean it to be insulting, and words that I don't really use that insinuate those types of things. But, just in common conversation, I don't take swearing as an offense, and if its offensive to you, please let me know, and I will try my best to refrain from dropping the "F-Bomb" in front of you. (:

4. I look REALLY young
This is an ongoing thing, a lot of people I work with still ask me, and when I meet new people at work or while working, I get asked a lot how old I really am. Even Andres', Mommy inquired how old I was. Yes, I'm quite aware that I look like I'm 17, and last year was the year my mother could afford braces on her flex-plan for the first time in forever. She told my brother he was getting them, he absolutely refused, my sister doesn't need them(even though she thinks she does) so she MADE me an appointment and told me I was going, end of story. Literally the day I got them, they made me look like I was no older than 17, or a Junior in HS, which-ever one you prefer really.
HOWEVER, I am the ripe age of 24, it says so on my drivers license, birth certificate and you know other forms of legal identification. I turn 25 this November....I'm not looking forward to it. >.>

I have issues with sleeping, not saying that I don't enjoy sleeping, because I truly truly cherish it.
But falling asleep on my own, or without aid is really difficult for me. I'm usually up at all hours of the night. I don't particularly like waking up before 8am, I do it anyways--sometimes with like 4 hours or less of sleep. I used to do it when I was still in school, but I'm not really sure how I did it then, because it seems like the older I get, the harder it is. I sound old now, this sucks. But I'm definitely a night owl, and not a morning person. Also, if I DO get to sleep and you wake me up BEFORE I'm supposed to be awake, like my mother does occasionally. She thinks she's all clever and shit waking me up at 7:30 in the morning every 5 mins telling me that its really a quarter after 8, *smh* lets just say, if you try this, do it at your own risk. There is a 90/10 chance----the 90 being your odds, that you will get yelled at, and/or something random or sharp thrown in your general direction. Plus it juss messes with my entire day when I get woken up early or in the middle of sleep, and makes me all groggy when I finally do get up. Yes, I realize that children are going to be amazing in this equation, but we'll take on that monster when it arrives...not any time soon BTW.

I have a really broad variety of music I listen to, ranging from oldies, to 90's, to dance dance revolution, and crazy emo days, to my deathmetal influencers, techno/dubstep dj friends, and straight to german screamo, hair metal, you name it, I probably know it, or listen to it- with the EXCEPTION of country.
There are reasons for this, later we shall discuss. I also like to listen to my music LOUD and usually with a ton of bass, which I'm sure isn't all that unique, but I'm just letting you know, when you're in my car/truck whatever, whatever is on shuffle, that's what you'll get.

7. I'S MOSTLY BROKEN & Yes, I do know normal, grammatically correct, English.
As like Socorro, I have a ton of health issues. Most of which can't be fixed because they are inherited or  just for the simple fact that I have no insurance, and I can't take care of them. I have gallstones, which pretty much means I can't eat very much of ANYTHING, and I'm sick like 75% of the time, one way or another. I have MAD ADHD, that I do take meds for so I can focus on work and my energy doesn't get drained trying to do 9000 things at once. I have REALLY horrible anxiety, which sometimes still does get the best of me, which I am also on meds for. My back normally does hurt most of the day, for various reasons. I have low blood sugar, and I normally have to keep drinking something or eat something with sugar every few hours.
Also, adding this into one thing, I do know proper "English", I have a lot of computer friends, I being one of them those computer kids, and I knows the terminology. I also have a gamer bf, who lurks in that world too. (: I haz is the same concept as, I have.

8. I am Half Native American (Navajo), and Half White (Scottish/English mix)
There are SOOOO many people who don't know this, and if I ever get REALLLY tan then I look really hispanic/mexican/whatever. I'm not, I tan really easily, and I hardly ever burn unless I'm in direct sunlight for like hours and hours on end. Also, this comes in with the hatred of country songs and music in general. When I was younger, we; my family and I and a few other families used to I guess, "tour" the summers with festivals and "wild west festivals" with the cowboy & indians theme, and you guessed it, we were the "indian" part of it. We'd dance and do the general pow-wow stuff, and it kinda became old really fast. We met a lot of country western bands/singers, performed with them etc... and usually the festivals went on for 3 days + at a time, which had the same schedules every day for the most part. So not only did the bands get old, but the songs did, especially the same exact ones, every single day... If anyone knows what a round dance is, just imagine doing that in a crowd of 500+ drunken "cowboy fans", you know drunk lady and men cowboy hat, cowboy boot wearing groupies for the most part.  We performed on stages with HUGE crowds, and did the side shows during the day when it was hot and did demonstrations and classes and sat at booths and etc etc... Some of my friends are still into it, and that's fine with me, but it really got old for me, and its not like I really have much time for it anymore now anyways.

I've done some particularly shit things in my past. Things I'm not really proud of, and I don't plan on repeating. I've got a lot of t-shirts and coffee mugs theoretically speaking, that say the been there, done that---it wasn't fun. Don't judge me by it, I learn from my mistakes, and I own up to my shit. Simple as that. I also don't take shit, so don't expect me to-- not saying this in a, "I'm such a badass" kind of way, its just common knowledge if you are reading thus far, you should probably just acknowledge and move right on. (: I stand up for myself, and I know me better than you, so I don't see a point to elaborate that any further.

This scares most people I know, my parents included. And most people would ask, "well if it does, why continue to do it". Well, if your parents didn't like the way you walked, would you just change it because of them? *Shrug* Everyone has an opinion, I'm over it. I like my piercings, no, none of them hurt. Except my nose, but that was just awkward--and I suppose my gauges did. Oh and YES, that's what I'm calling them, get over it. >.> I really love my tattoos, I never get ANYTHING just for the hell of it, everything I have means something to me, and I SWEAR to you, every single time I get something new, my Dad will ask me, "So you swear that you can get those removed for sure if you wanted to..?" -He always has the, "you will regret those when you're my age" speech on the back burner when the first disapproval fails too.
I do agree, that there is some people that can't pull of some looks, and piercings and just really shouldn't of gotten some tattoos, or in some places. But again, opinions man. ---In a short note, I also like to change my hair a lot, I love love loved the "emo" stage just in the fact that I could dye it any color and it'd be legit. (:

11. I LOVE Art & Music
All forms of it. My mom is really good at drawing, painting "realistic" things, and I come from a family of musicians. My dad is a guitarist, and a guitar teacher and also just a TEACHER, yes I had him in HS-- again, later. My sister and my brother are also musicians, really good ones in fact. I however, am not. I do like Art though, painting, drawing, scribbles, photography and writing. I used to be really good at it, like as in, if I look/read back on somethings I have done, I'm kind of like amazed, and wonder what the eff happened to me and why I suck so bad now. =p
I did a year in Culinary Arts & Graphic Design...and 3 years in AP Art in HS, I loves it all man.

--and quite possibly your guitar teacher.  Thus, I know far too much about germs and micro-biology and illness and cures for illness' and all that crazy stuff. I know far too much for my brain to put into actual you know, wording known for all kinds of human right meow.

I can't make up my mind half of the time, like I know what I want out of life and the really really hard decisions, but when it comes down to like what we should do today; what colors I want to wear on my eyes or what to buy at the grocery store. Man.... don't give me options, haha. Again, did I really pick a major in college, hahaha NO!

14. I will probably be the "best-est" friend you will ever have
No lie, I love people, I care about people, I've been in a lot of really crazy, scary, insane, stupid and bad situations. If I haven't been in your situation its usually because of gender or in the N/A section.
Once we're friends, I'm pretty much there no matter what, regardless of the situation, or the argument, I'm usually just there for you no matter what. For the record, this does get taken advantage of a lot, and it HAS been in the past, but usually if I agree to share something with you, or say yes to something, then unless seriously guilt-tripped into it, then its upon my own will. AKA: I am FAR too nice for the average human. I will go out of my way for strangers, and WAY out of my way for people I really like, and care about. If you have a good reason, and it is interrupting my day or my schedule, if I know you are just bullshitting me, then we've usually got a deal. It sucks though when people take this to their advantage, as you can probably see how..
But if you need advice, or a ride or money or your trapped or stranded or just need a friend, you should have my number or a way to get ahold of me. USE IT. I'm great at advice, and good at being the therapist, I am for a lot of people and friends. U-S-E  I-T haha, I really don't mind. I'm good to vent to.

JK Eliza-- no really though. I am grown up, again, I've done my share of stupid shit. But I have learned, I've grown up a lot in the last 5 or so years, I really have. I have a remarkable amount of empathy towards the general public its fucking ridiculous. But I know what I want out of life, and I'm really quite driven. Once I want something, I will go for it. It might take me a while, but if its something that I really want, then I will try my hardest until I get there. Even if its against all normal odd's, and there's tons of obstacles I will venture forward. You'll never get anywhere in life if you always let the good pass you by because it seems too hard. I love. That's a really good way that I think I would describe myself. Thus, I have a tattoo that says, "With Love" which is true, I will love forever. I will love my family, my friends, my loves, my pets, my life. I will never quit loving, to me if I quit loving, I quit trying. I might say I hate everything sometimes, but who doesn't really? There are sooo many opportunities out there, and if you aren't sure on at least what you'd like out of them, you will miss out. I've seen, experienced, done a lot and yeah some of it was fun and I've had adventures. But a lot of it was just bullshit and stupid crazy stuff. Again, without being too redundant I've learned from my mistakes and they've made me a better person, with a clearer sight of what I want and how its going to be possible of getting it. (:

I watch a lot of movies.

Cooking is fun.
I really like talking on the phone.
Words with Friends= <3
I am addicted to YouTube
I work far too much
I'm pretty confident that I'm allergic to pineapple
I hate fish, but I like some sushi.
-Underøath, Bright Eyes, Brand New-
I don't do drugs, but I sometimes drink.
I know most of the words to, Wannabe
I know ALL of the words to, Ohio is for Lovers

I HAVE to sleep with background noise.

I am taken and in absolute Love with this guy from Florida, his name is Andres Escudero.

I also really like purple.

We Don't Need The Light

Well hello blog world, its been almost forever.
Actually it has been forever. Its been like.. nearly 6 months since I've written, which kinda threw my new years resolution for a spin. This is why I don't make these damn things, they never work out...

Catch up.
McDonalds; GONE.
April I found a good job again, at Walmart of all places, but not the shitty evil one in Springville. Surprisingly its in Orem, and I really like it there actually *knocks on wood*- the people there are really friendly (the ones I work with) and the management doesn't blow nuggets of insane doom.  Quite nice actually. I enjoy actually going to work again. Long story short, started on the remodel. Kept it up quite nicely, and they decided they liked me enough to keep me hired. Met some awesome kids, and some new friends. Then became the lovely cashier again that you all know me as today :)

ALSO, in a quite amazing relationship with this lovely Andres.
In doing so, created quite a ruckus with some friends.
Started out with Bekkah, and I'm only mentioning her name really because she has me blocked and in case anyone decides to tell her, go for it. But she freaked cuz I was chillin' with Serena and Pablo a ton, didn't enjoy not being center of attention anymore I guess. >.<
Then, when I find friends, of course you know people and other people can never really agree to, tooooo much with just one thing. I guess some people never really find a fantastic medium place, aka common ground.

So I am again, a lone wolf. You know, aside from Andres. But I guess it's all good, I mean I still have friends that will always be there for me. Mostly because they are always there, just not always with with me. In lamer terms I guess, I have friends that are mostly considered family, as in they will never really go anywhere, and they will keep moving forward which is what they really should do. (:

And so for the now; I am working, trying to stay and keep another job, hopefully so I can either go get Andres OR so I can just move to Florida all together (:  Turns out its dramatically cheaper there, and nicer and you know the BEACH. (:
So I suppose we will see what works out better. (: